Adopt the pace of nature. Her secret is patience.
It is not unusual for sex and porn addicts, when we start treatment, to expect that much of the work we do in therapy or rehab will focus on the identification and resolution of childhood issues. That is not in fact the case. Even though addressing early-life trauma is often an aspect of sex and porn addiction treatment, it’s just one among many, and it’s typically not an initial priority. Other concerns, like stopping problem behaviors, breaking through denial, and developing a basic understanding of addiction, are far more important in the early stages of recovery. Once we’ve established and learned to implement the concrete tools and life-skills we need to stay sober, our therapist may, if we so desire it, explore the issues that typically underlie addictions, such as childhood neglect, abuse, and trauma. But that should not happen in-depth until we’re on solid ground with our sexual sobriety.
Task for Today
Stop worrying about why you’re addicted and focus on what you’re going to do about it.