Sponsors light the torches that lead others through the dark.
Sponsors are personal guides to healing and staying sexually sober, usually not friends to begin with and never lovers. Typically, a sponsor is someone of the same gender who has been in sexual recovery long enough to have achieved some success. He or she should be active in recovery and have worked his or her way through the 12 steps. In addition, a sponsor’s personal situation should somewhat match that of the sponsee, so that he or she can guide the newly recovering addict more individually. For example, if the newly recovering sex or porn addict is married with kids, a sponsor who is also married with kids might be preferable. If the newly recovering addict is HIV-positive, it might be helpful to have an HIV-positive sponsor. Etc.
Task for Today
Create a list of the people you know in recovery who ‘speak your language’ and ‘have what you want.’ Do this even if you already have a great sponsor.