If We Want to Heal, We Must Do the Work of Healing

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It’s not what you say to everyone else that determines your life; it’s what you whisper to yourself that has the greatest power.

Sex and porn addicts share certain characteristics. One of these common traits is we somehow think other people can make us feel worthwhile and complete. We endow them with some magical ability to fix us and make us happy. Often, that magical quality disappears immediately after we have sex with them. Either way, as part of recovery we need to accept that other people can’t fix us or make us happy. Sobriety and happiness are both an internal job. We establish sobriety and find happiness by accepting who we are, being grateful for the life we have (no matter how messed up our life happens to be at any given moment), and being a better person today than yesterday.

Just for Today
Think of a time when you hoped someone else could fix you. Share in a meeting how that worked out.