Combatting Shame

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Shame is an antisocial emotion. Talking about shame is the social solution.

As active sex and porn addicts, we spent our days trying very hard to not feel our shame. We did this by escaping into sexual fantasy and behavior. Other shame avoidance coping mechanisms we turned to likely included isolating, keeping secrets, people-pleasing, and being aggressive, along with compulsive drinking, drugging, gambling, spending, etc. Unfortunately, all the mechanisms that we used to avoid feelings of shame also prevented meaningful interpersonal connection, which happens to be the only proven way to abolish and destroy shame.

Task for Today
Try to identify three shameful beliefs that you have about yourself and think about how they trigger your addiction.