With sexual addiction, shame is the master emotion.
A considerable amount of research makes it clear that not talking about a shaming event is usually more damaging than the actual event. So, it’s not any specific shameful event, belief, or feeling that drags us into our obsessive quest for emotional and psychological escape through sex, it’s that our shame is not properly addressed and processed. When shameful events, beliefs, and feelings are openly discussed, even years after the fact, they lose their power. And with that, sexual addiction also loses its power. In recovery circles, this process is sometimes referred to as “uncover, discover, discard.”
Just for Today:
Share a shameful sexual secret in therapy or a 12-step sexual recovery meeting. Notice how much better you feel after doing this.