When is the last time someone gave you the peace of their heart rather than a piece of their mind?
Having a knowledgeable and empathetic support network is a key to recovery. But healthy friendships are not something sex addicts are typically good at, which leaves us asking, “How do we know who to invite into our inner circle?” Happily, there are some easily identifiable qualities. Safe friends are people who:
- Respect and maintain our and their boundaries
- Do not gossip or share information they have been entrusted with
- Understand that we are in a process of healing and recovery and are willing to be in that process with us
- Do not collude with us in pretending that things are perfectly OK when they’re not
- Do not stoke our fear by telling us horror stories that cause us to imagine worst-case scenarios
- Have wisdom to share and offer sound, useful advice when we ask for it
- Are available and willing when we need support
If we can find even one or two people who are able and willing to support us in these ways, we’ve got the beginnings of a terrific support network.
Just for Today
I will make a list of people that I might want in my support network, looking for qualities that appear in the list above.